Liste des putes disponibles

[Aziz du loft]

Nihil tu t'es jamais demandé si ta pouf pouvait te tromper?

Pose toi la question alors...mon grand;)


Message à ta pouf :
T'es vraiment une salope de faire ça à un pauvre garçon comme nihil qui a eu des pb psychologiques dans son enfance dù au refus de sa mère de lui donné le sein, d'etre né avec un micro penis avec une tache de naissance sur le gland...

Nihil mon pauvre je compatis dans ta douleur de victime;)

amicalement Aziz du loft

[lapinchien]

David Wayne Spade, son of Judy Todd and Wayne Spade, came into this world on July 22, 1964 in the town of Birmingham, MI. A comedic genius was born. Brothers Bryan and Andrew welcomed him.
When David was only four years old, the family moved to Arizona. Soon after, Wayne Spade left his family. Several years later, his step-father, a war veteran, committed suicide.
In 1982, David graduated from Saguaro High School in Scottsdale, AZ. He studied business at Arizona State University and graduated in 1986.
David's illustrious career began by performing as a stand-up comedian in clubs, theaters, and colleges across the country.
David's television debut came on Saturday Night Live, where he served as both a writer and performer. During his first season on Saturday Night Live, David appeared only three times. It was just a short time before he was named the Hot Stand-Up Comedian of the Year by Rolling Stone magazine.
David's popularity on Saturday Night Live, along with his obvious chemistry with the late Chris Farley, led to the duo starring in two films, Tommy Boy in 1995, followed by Black Sheep in 1996. David and Chris ultimately won the 1996 MTV Movie Award for Best On-Screen Duo for Tommy Boy.
David's portrayal of Dennis Finch on NBC's "Just Shoot Me!" earned him an Emmy nomination and an American Comedy Award in 1999, and Golden Globe nominations in 1999 and 2000.
David appeared in HBO's 13th Annual Young Comedians Special, which led to him headlining his very own HBO Special, David Spade: Take the Hit.
David has since appeared in the hit animated film "The Emperor's New Groove," the off-the-wall comedy "Joe Dirt," and Dickie Roberts: Former Child Star.
Starting out with a three-episode guest-starring role on ABC's 8 Simple Rules, David has now signed on to at least finish out this season.
David is currently involved in filming the animated "Racing Stripes," scheduled for theatrical release January 2005, as well as an as-of-yet titled Christmas comedy, due out in time for the holiday season.

[Kirunaa]

Encore un qui comprendra jamais les valeurs de la partouze et de l'echangisme... c'est triste l'impuissance.
Mais tu sais, c'est pas grave Aziz ! Je suis sure qu'ici on devrait pouvoir trouver une bonne âme pour t'enculer, ne serait-ce que parmis les morts.

T'étais pas sencé te tirer dernièrement ?

[lapinchien]

LOST & FOUND
* (PG-13)


Dylan: David Spade
Lila: Sophie Marceau
Wally: Artie Lange
Rene: Patrick Bruel
Mark: Mitchell Whitfield
Millstone: Martin Sheen
Uncle Harry: Jon Lovitz



Directed by Jeff Pollack. Written by J.B. Cook, Marc Meeks and David Spade. Running time: 98 minutes. Rated PG-13 (for crude and sex-related humor, brief nudity and language).




BY ROGER EBERT



``Lost & Found'' is a movie about characters of limited intelligence, who wander through the lonely wastes of ancient and boring formulas. No one involved seems to have had any conviction that it could be great. It's the kind of movie where the hero imitates Neil Diamond--and he's not making fun of him, he's serious.


In asking us to believe David Spade as a romantic lead, it miscalculates beyond all reason. Spade is wrong by definition for romantic leads, because his persona is based on ironic narcissism and cool detachment. A girl has to be able to believe it when a guy says she loves her more than anything else in the world. When Spade says it, it means he doesn't love anything else in the world, either.


Spade plays the owner of an Italian restaurant in Los Angeles. Like not very many owners of Italian restaurants, his name is Dylan. I have three hints for Dylan. (1) Unless you know them very well, customers do not like to be caressed on their arms as you pass their tables. (2) Although waiters must touch plates while serving them, it is bad form for the owner to put his thumb on a plate while it is being eaten from. (3) During renovations, do not seat customers directly below drywall with holes ripped in it.


Most L.A. restaurant owners do not live in colorful apartment buildings where all the neighbors know one another, and little old ladies play strip poker. But the screenplay throws in the colorful rental units as a way of supplying recycled sitcom characters and to place Dylan near the apartment of Lila (Sophie Marceau), a French cellist. She has a former boyfriend named Rene (Patrick Bruel), whose function is to look pained and supply straight lines to Dylan. And she has a dog named Jack who is treated as much like the dog in ``There's Something About Mary'' as is possible without actually including clips from the other movie.


Dylan and Lila have a Meet Cute. She runs into him and knocks him flat, with her landing on top, which is about the cheapest Meet Cute you can buy at the Movie Cliche Store. He falls in love with Lila, gets nowhere, and steals her dog so that he can claim to have found it and thus win her love. Lila is so unobservant that Dylan often carries the dog past her windows, and even walks it in a nearby park, without Lila ever seeing them together. When the dog needs to poop, Dylan wears one of those tool belts you see on power company linemen, with eight or nine bright plastic pooper-scoopers dangling from it. Supplying a character with too much equipment is a creaky comedy wheeze; in a good movie, they'd give him one pooper scooper and think of something funny to do with it.


Anyway. Dylan has an employee at the restaurant named Wally (Artie Lange), who is tall, fat and dumb, sleeps over one night and ends up in Dylan's bed because he gets scared. As they leap to attention in the morning, they can't even think of a funny payoff (such as Steve Martin in ``Planes, Trains & Automobiles,'' shouting at John Candy, ``That wasn't a pillow!''). Instead, when Lila rings the doorbell, they both answer the door in their underpants and she assumes they're gay. Ho, ho.


Meanwhile, Jack the dog eats junk food and throws up. When Dylan comes home, we get a nauseated-dog's-eye-view of an optically distorted Dylan dressed in 1970s disco gear while dancing to a record. Don't ask how a dog could have this hallucination; be thankful instead that the dog's fantasies are more interesting than any other visual in the movie.


``Lost & Found'' ends at a big lawn party for rich people, which in movies about people over 21 is the equivalent of the senior prom scene in all other movies. There is a role for Martin Sheen, as Mr. Millstone, the tight-fisted banker who wants to fly in Neil Diamond as a surprise for his wife. In 1979, Martin Sheen starred in ``Apocalypse Now.'' In 1999, he plays Mr. Millstone. I wish he had taken my advice and gone into the priesthood.


As for the Neil Diamond imitation, my best guess is that David Spade secretly thinks he could have a parallel career as a Las Vegas idol and is showing us how he can do Neil Diamond better than Diamond himself. All that's lacking is for Spade to take that hank of hair that hangs in front of his eyes and part it, so that it hangs over his ears.


Truth in Criticism: The movie has one funny scene, starring Jon Lovitz, as a Dog Whisperer.

[nihil]

Euh... Oui, LC, tu voulais quelque chose ?

[lapinchien]

Je pense qu'Aziz du loft sait de quoi je veux parler... Si j'en crois son avatar çà doit être un grand fan de David Spade et je tenais juste à le ridiculiser un peu en rappelant qu'il a joué dans LOST & FOUND un film avec Sophie Marceau et Patrick Bruel (la honte !)... Je pense qu'il comprendra la leçon et qu'il s'en ira d'ici en pleurant ses tripes car il est notoire que tout le monde est l'idole de son avatar... moi même j'adore les lapins jaunes pixélisé crucifiés.. c'est mon but dans la vie... J'imagine que d'autres comme Arka ambitionnent de devenir interupteurs... en tout cas grace à moi on est pas pret de le revoir ... arf ! arf! arf !

[Aziz du loft]

Me tirer? non je voulais juste faire jouir nihil avec l'annonce de mon départ...ça n'a pas manqué;)

Echangisme? Tu t'es déjà fait enculé par un lapin chien?

Lapinchien t'es tjrs à l'ouest toi! Plutot carottes ds le cul ou lèche cul?

[lapinchien]

plutot carottes dans ton cul puis te la faire lècher... enfin j'suis un gentillet quoi

[Aziz du loft]

Merde Lapinchien!! Tu manques de répartit....
Je me demandais si tu étais neuneu....j'ai mantenant une réponse fiable;)

[lapinchien]

y a vait qu'a me le demandé... parfois on emprunte des détours et des bifurcations que jamais on aurait dû emprunter sans bien trop savoir pourquoi..; un peu comme David Vincent par ailleurs... pour finalement arriver à un but qu'on aurait pu atteindre plus directement. Effectivement je suis un neuneu, je te le concède... bien sûr tout est relatif donc j'avoue être un neuneu si toi t'est un neuneu².

Heu pis en parlant de répartie.... quand est ce que tu pense à répartir toi ?

[Aziz du loft]

C'est bien ce que je pensais....

[lapinchien]

arrete un peu de sublimer ton ego je te prie

[Aziz du loft]

Sublimer mon égo....je suis trop cash pour ça;)

Ceci dit c'est bien trouvé! Là tu me fais plaisir! En une phrase t'as été meilleur que dans tout tes précédents posts assemblés! ( mais j'aime bien tes bides quand même;) )

[lapinchien]

et encore t'as pas vu les ravages de mon régime dissocié "que pizzas"... donc si j'ai bien compris avec toi c'est une grosse claque dans la gueule suivie d'un rocalin ? non pasqu'ici c'est pas "SOS torcionnaire cherche femme à battre puis à torturer émotionnellement se contentant en cas de pénurie du premier mutant de passage pour faire sa tite crise d'autoritarisme"

et encore j'suis soft, t'as du pot d'avoir eu droit à ma séquence freudienne pasque  j'aurais très bien pu me contenter d'un "ben si t'es cash ... va t'casher"

en tous cas à la zone les calumets de la paix on les enterre dans ton cul

[Aziz du loft]

Pourquoi t'as un problème avec les sado masos machos?

En tout cas je vois que la carotte dans le cul te fait sortir de ta niche;)
"Va chercher la baballe! " ....et le lapinchien te la ramène ;D

ça tombe bien pour les camulets mon cul c'est un Huron;)

A la zone les bons textes on les sort de ton cul? :pute